13 May 2013

Public Apology

Today we are challenged to issue a public apology and mine has been a long time coming... To my brother.

Dear David, 

I would like to take this opportunity to publicly apologise for all the things I may have done in the past that scared the pants off you; telling ghost stories, tales about killer clowns that could get you on the way home from school, hid behind corners only to jump out on you. The list is long.

All these things are terrible I know, but in my defence they are only typical of any older sister and I think are well within my rights.

I sincerely apologise if any of the stories have left lingering traumas or emotional scarring. Uneasiness around clowns perhaps or a need to check the roof of any car you exit for an escaped psychopath.

It was not actually my intention to scar you for life in any way. In fact all of these things actually scared the pants off me first, I was just trying to ease my fears by passing them on to you. 

I do hope that, as you are a fantastic person with the best sense of humour, you would in some way credit me with these aspects of your personal development as I do believe that my years of torture training have played some part in who you are today. So really, you should be grateful.

I hope you accept my apology with the dignity and composure that I helped create.

As always, your loving sister


P.S What's that behind you?!!


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